We’ve just registered for the upcoming 100 Women in Hedge Funds luncheon to benefit LIFE (Literacy is For Everyone). If you haven’t registered you should take a look as it sounds like a great event – an interesting speaker, an important and worthy cause, and…. great…. networking. Ugh… don’t you hate that word?!
As someone who toots their own horn about being at the centre of all things ‘communication’, about it being my thing and for being generally known as an outgoing people person – arriving at a networking event is something I dread. Once I’m there and I warm up, it’s fine. But it’s the arrival part I dislike. It takes every ounce of self-control to not fumble through my handbag, pull out my iPhone and respond to a pretend corporate crisis. For other people, the entire event can be a struggle, while others may enjoy the event thoroughly but walk away having achieved nothing more than sharing a few vacation stories.
So, would you rather attend a business cocktail party or have a crown replaced at the dentist?
If the latter sounds more appealing, then perhaps the following tips might help relieve some of your networking anxiety and awkwardness.
Be prepared. Know who is going to be there and who would you like to meet. Think about topics of conversation and questions in advance. Have a strategy to help you focus. Set yourself a goal.
Know yourself. What kind of settings are you most comfortable in, allow you to shine and be yourself? Networking can be enjoyable and rewarding when you match it to your personality. If large conferences aren’t your thing look at small gatherings or a one-on-one coffee catch up. If you’re not a morning person skip the breakfast seminar.
Share and be generous. Focus on how you can help others in the room. Share your contacts, offer to make introductions, try out a new product or use someone’s service. By shifting the emphasis to seeing the event as opportunities for random acts of kindness, you will forget your nervousness by focusing on others instead of yourself.
Be engaged and have good manners. Smile. Have good eye contact and truly listen to what is being said. Make meaningful connections. If you see someone adrift in the networking sea, throw them a lifeline – introduce yourself and others.
Have an exit strategy. Starting and ending conversations is often the most difficult part of networking. Use open-ended questions to get the chat going – How did you get involved in…? What do you enjoy most about what you do? Open-ended questions require more than a one word response, show you are interested in the other person, and help build and maintain rapport. And to close – I’m going to go mingle some more, but it was nice chatting. I’d love to stay in touch, can we trade cards? I’m going to grab another drink, fantastic to meet you. Nobody expects to monopolise your time so it’s ok to move on.
And although you would rather poke yourself in the eye with a cocktail fork than talk to a stranger, a big part of growing and developing is putting yourself in new situations. So, move outside your comfort zone. New connections are the life blood of your career and can open up a world of new opportunities. You may be surprised, many new networking acquaintances can become friends.
So if you see me enter the 100WHF luncheon, look nervously around, eyes darting to find safe harbour in a sea of faces, please come and say hello before I have time to reach into that bag and pull out my phone!
